anger management needed

hello, it's friday and it's all good.
just wanted to write something as a moral lesson and examples of -what-not-to-do in the future.

so, for the past two days, my boss was featured in an article in our local newspapers.
of course it is about him being the collector of expensive bicycles in this face of the earth.
they even said his bike is gold plated bike. can you imagine how expensive can one bike be? and he collects about 19 of them. it's crazy and interesting for some people but to me it is just plain crazy.
unacceptable.

most of my mates in the office were shaking our heads, disappointed with our soo-called boss. our managing director.

this weekend, his team (of cyclist from west malaysia) and himself would join a cycling tournament which he sponsored by the way most of the accommodation and entertainment to gain his popularity among cyclistssss in Malaysia. i think those cyclists that he sponsored are so lucky to have to taste his sweet RM whereby us, those who actually work and contribute something to his company get nothing. yes, we get our salary and bonuses at the end of the year and that is it.

every now and then, we talked to one another and hoping something "great" will happened to us in the office, for example, office trip to Sabah or Batang Ai or anything! but no.

but that doesn't break us, still. we can still smile with each other and even to our boss.

for me, i think i have lost my respect towards my boss. he gave this negative energy around me with his narcissism and his ego. he is not humble of what he is and he makes fun of others who "doesn't" make it.

im so furious to work under his company and his name. really. i think, most of us, the staffs, deserved a little more appreciation and acknowledgment from him. we deserved it. we do. we worked with our full determination and dedication and we get nothing but our monthly salary. come on.

oh yea, this week, he put on 2 more CCTV at the office. maybe just to check on us whether we spend to much time talking in the pantry.

i used to feel bad talking bad about my boss like this, but now? not anymore. not anymore. i gave up being the "good guy" here. i just gave up.

weekenders

i just love love love weekends and public holidays.
today, i went for a swim at KBS in the morning,
went for lunch and a little birthday gift shopping for Izzat (Syafiq's brother).
i bought him a play doh because the cho-cho train was too expensive.
now, i have to plan something for Syafiq's and my mum's birthday next month.
so many things to buy but too little money to spend. hah!

a morning swim feels great. since last night i fell sick in the head,
pooped 2 pain killers, went after a goodnight sleep, then i felt better in the morning.
that is why i decided to go for a swim.

saw a dad, bringing his kid (toddler) for a swim and it makes me jealous.
i soo want that in the future.
blah bla blah bla blah.

anyway, i just want to remember the weekend that i've spent with my loved ones.
maybe i 'll just my blog in the weekend, yes?

i used to do photo blogging but now, i dont feel like it anymore.
don't ask me why.

InsyaAllah, i will write again sometimes next week.

nine months of hiatus

hello. it's been awhile. i've been neglecting my humble blog and now i'm back! it's been a great hiatus, not just from blogging, but from facebook as well. i've been calmer now, spiritually and mentally.

i feel like i dont have a heart to face them people in facebook and i'm aching for a real conversation and companionship. but i still keep in touch with others through twitter and tumblr though. sometimes i feel like i understand / know the strangers in twitter and tumblr world better than anyone in facebook. i didn't feel left out at all.

so far, life has been ups and down for me. trying to stay away from as much drama as i possibly can.
it is better this way i guess.

been reading a few books from the author Haruki Murakami too. my favourite so far would be Norwegian Wood. Sputnik Sweetheart, Kafka on the shore and Wind-up bird chronicle were so-so for me. i think this year, i read a lot. compare to the previous years. some independent author like Manu Joseph and Tony Parson were not bad eh. it's just that the books have something that i dont like in common. cheating husbands and infidelity. not my cup of tea i supposed.

keeping myself busy with a little sports too. i'm back playing ping-pong and badminton. it felt great. i get to swim too. aaaahhh. i just love love love spending my time with doing such activity. it makes my day worth while.

so, until next time. bye.

always hopeful but never expect

not even sure what that title would mean.

hopeful. "i hope that tomorrow will be better than today."

expectation. "i expect tomorrow will be awesome and greater than today."

.....

promised that i would post a few pictures of my trip to S'pore here in my humble blog.

so, there you go..

....

oh ya..HAVE A GREAT CHINESE NEW YEAR everyone..

dragon year for the win..

flowers in december

Before i skipped a month post, i just want to let you know that by far, December 2011 has been a heck of series of drama. im not even sure whether it's right or not.

from drama in my office, personal struggle and friendship. Thank God. whatever happened, make me who i am today. Glad to see Joel back in town after all these years. Met up with him with Desmond just the other night. i celebrated new year with my lovely boyfriend at waterfront kuching, just to see a glimpse of fireworks. heh. "madot" in a way but thats okay.

my cousin Azul got married during Christmas and we had tons of fun. So far, it has been the best wedding i have ever attend. Mum and i were dancing and we were singing along to wadever record was playing. Surely a wedding to remember. will post up a few pic of the wedding later.

Weekend at Singapore

Erm, went to Singapore last weekend with Syafiq. Had lots of fun.

Especially at the Universal Studio in Sentosa Island.

Day 1- 051111

. Touch down

. Lunch

. Checked In

. Head down to Orchard Road

. Straight to Arab Street

. I called it a night

Day 2- 061111

. Sentosa Island

. Universal Studio Baby!

. Cable Car

. Marina Bay

. Esplanade

. He called it a night

Day 3-071111

. Breakie at Alesandra's Ikea

. Head down to Changi's Airport

. Chillax at the airport from 1.30pm till our flight at 6.20pm

can you see me in the future?

tadaaa. i am still imagining the future pregnant me.

please read the previous post if you dont know what im talkin' about. woot woot.

random future.

"I think i may have found a good design for my bride of honor dress for my cousin's wedding."

......

Lets just skip the marriage part and straight to pregnancy part instead.

....im imagining myself sun-bathing by the pool or by the beach with my cute bikini on any other the weekend and went swimming in the pool with my baby inside my tummy. i look glowing and definitely cute-r than ever. my boobs obviously would be big and oohh.. my skin, definitely radiant. i will drink/eat/bath milk everyday....

Whoever my husband will be, here's a heads up for you, I PROMISE I WILL MAKE YOU HAPPY as long as the time would allow me to.

Yes. I am that random and lame. So much for such positivity.

So, my friend asked me the other day, why go to pregnancy part and skip the marriage part?

so i told her, thinking of getting married or settling down depresses me.

Sad but true. Seems like everyone is settling down. Honestly, im happy for them. Too bad for me, i dont really trust the ceremony or anything that goes with it. Seems fake but fun. Especially those who planned on having a big, lavishing and a fancy wedding.

I encourage you not to do it!

PEOPLE ARE too focus on the beginning part which is the wedding but not the marriage itself.

Its a big responsibility and a tough commitment to be involved with in the first place.

Dont do it just because everyone is doing it. Its not worth it.

Wonder how i know?

When you know, you just know, you know?